As Valentine’s Day approaches, I want to invite and encourage you to lean in to self love and acceptance this year. It’s something I continue to work on that needed deep healing in my own life, especially with so much focus on popularity in my culture. Have you ever struggled with self doubt or rejection? If so, you’re definitely not alone! I’m still healing my spiritual heart piece by piece. I’m sharing an intimate experience I had recently because it might be healing medicine for others who have been through similar heartaches.
I was blessed to be able to join Pixie Lighthorse for her 7 Journeys offering this year. It was the first time I’d done a live journey session like that with her and a group of others online. It was incredibly healing and beautiful for me. One of the journeys was focused on the heart energy center. If you’re unfamiliar with this kind of journey work, it’s largely about taking the time and attention to tune in to our own imagination, intuition, and wisdom (without any drugs!). Everyone has their own experience. This is a glimpse into mine from that day. There is also a downloadable audio inspired by that experience further below.
I felt inspired to have a feathery type plant with me. So, I stepped outside in the winter afternoon sunshine and onto the earth that was still frozen before the session started. I saw a bright green fern leaf that was already bent and broken volunteering. Green is one of the colors associated with the heart chakra and a color I’m focusing on representing health in many ways for me this year. I was laying down with the fern on my heart area when the journey started. At first, I was feeling a bit lost and wandering. Then, I felt the plant medicine of unfurling ferns and blooming roses. I remembered a poem I wrote a few years ago about being born to bloom.
I asked how I could love and connect with less concern about external approval or being popular. I found myself held inside a soft silky rose and imagined my heart opening petal by petal. Grandmother Bear came to visit (we must have been the size of cartoon fairies to fit inside a rose but I wasn’t thinking about that). She gently sliced open the middle of my back where I’ve had pain off and on for the past few years. She reached in to remove thorns in my heart one by one over and over. I also felt like she was unwrapping barbed wire. She was slowly taking out all of the thorns and barbs and healing each spot where something was removed with warm tears and honey. I sensed that the thorns were representing “conditions” that I had learned or been exposed to about love, acceptance, approval, and belonging in the past. She was helping me to be free of constricting conditions so that my heart could open and expand and feel unconditional love. When she was finished, Bear closed up the incision in my back with a paste made from plants, dirt, and honey as it healed fully and quickly. I guess I had a sort of spiritual open heart surgery.
Do you have any thorns that need to be gently removed from your heart to heal in some way?
I’ve created a free audio guided visualization inspired by that experience if you’d like to listen. Simply sign up at JulesOstara.com/MagicMail to receive access to all of the presents I share freely for email VIPs, including the downloadable audio.
My thorns used to have a lot to do with physical appearance. There were memories from being forced to get on a scale as a teenager and many comments about my weight being a determining factor in whether or not I would ever find a husband (even though I had the smallest size skirt on the cheerleading squad at the time). I also think of grades and how success could lead to external approval (or lack of). Add to that all the media messages we get about beauty products and what it looks like to be cool. I imagine many of us have some conditions we associate with love. These days, the thorns might be about how many friends/followers we have on social media or how many ‘likes’ we get or what our ‘net worth’ is. Even though I truly felt loved unconditionally by my mother, which may be why the bear was a mother energy, I’ve struggled with all of this over the years.
I gladly pass on the vision from the journey in case it may be medicine for others as well. I invite you to do some ‘unlearning’ with me if you want to open up to unconditional love for yourself. Remove any thorns. I’ve declared Valentine’s Day to be a self love day in the past and have found that approach to be quite healing. I encourage you to try it.
If the kind of journey practice I described appeals to you, I recommend Pixie Lighthorse’s courses. She respects various cultural backgrounds and beliefs. I also did the one she offers in downloadable pdf form (from previous recordings) about Intention Setting with Horse earlier in January and found it to be very worthwhile.
Though I’ve traveled along winding roads and through a few dark nights to heal wounds from abuse, anxiety, and grief, I prefer to celebrate and enjoy the present. I invite you to lean in to life with me, even with the messes and the mysteries, to find the magic in it all. In my book, The Girl Who Dances With Delight, I share ways that I’ve added rhythm, ritual, and enrichment to lighten my days and liven up. The book is about falling in love with ourselves and with life. I share many suggestions that have had a beautiful, healing impact in my whole life, mind, body, and spirit. I wrote a lot about my journey to more self acceptance and liberation with plenty of encouragement and activities for others to join me.
You can receive a free gift peek inside the book with excerpts and the basic D.A.N.C.E. steps at ThriveTrue.com/DanceGift. (The word D.A.N.C.E. is an acronym reminder.) This free gift is like an invitation to a pre-party. I share the original activities that led to the writing of the book and supported me through the writing process. The book itself is now available on Amazon (with free shipping) and in bookstores now. Signed copies are available here on my website.
We are all worthy of joy! Delight can be ecstatic and exciting or strong and soft serenity and inner peace. Delight is a fascinating spark glowing inside us. See it twinkling in your eyes. Give yourself a big self love hug!
Card is from the Heart of Life deck
We were born to bloom from the heart.
Well Wishes to You,
Jules
Julia Ostara
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