May Mother’s Day be filled with love, hugs, and holding hands.♡ A lady on a ferry in the San Juan Islands last year shared with me her realization that since her mom’s recent death, she must now mother herself. It had been about 5 years since my mother’s death (almost 6 now) at the time of that conversation. I’m still coming to terms with this idea of “mothering myself”.
And, I wonder, did my dear friend whose birth mother died when she was only 2 feel this way her whole life? Did her loving step-mother manage to free her of that role for a while? Did my friend whose mom died in a car accident when we were in junior high school find a way to mother herself at that age when we were still so young? Did my grandmother feel the need to mother herself when she found out as a teenager that she was adopted? Is a woman’s instinct to mother sometimes so strong that we seek any means to fill that role, with pets, siblings, partners, when perhaps, we could also focus on mothering ourselves? Is it even possible to mother ourselves? Just yesterday, I recognized the similarity to that idea and the most recent offering I’ve been pouring love, time, and energy into, the May 2016 Thrivival online course/retreat, Inner Compass. Now, I can see that the focus on tuning into our own true natures, our inner compass, and also, tuning into Mother Earth holding us, is related to this concept of “mothering one’s self”.
While pondering a bit, I find myself choosing to give myself a big self love hug, hold my own hand, look in the mirror and say, “good morning, beautiful.” So, I’m sharing this today in case anyone else out there is grieving the loss of your mother in some way and might find this same idea worthwhile. May you find a way to be the mother that you need if/when the need arises.
In addition, I am so very grateful for the many mentors and framily (friends + family) that fill my life with love, encouragement, and hugs (even the virtual kind). After losing the obvious physical presence of my biggest cheerleader (I still feel that a less obvious physical presence is very much with me!), my angel momma, it can be challenging sometimes to keep looking up… being held in love by others makes a difference. To all of you that have spent any time with me through the online efforts I’ve made (started in memory of my mom), thank YOU! It truly warms my heart and I hope the feeling is mutual.
To all who find Mother’s Day difficult… those grieving the loss of a child or mother, those wishing you could be a mother, those that gave up the chance to be a mother and wonder “what if”, those that wish you had been or had a better mother, whatever might make this holiday particularly difficult, I hope that you may hold yourself in love today, celebrate the good times and blessings, forgive the hard times (whether your own or your mother’s), and find a way to acknowledge and nourish the mother inside (whether a mother to pets or children, homes and gardens, or self). And to any men that might come across this, if any, I hope you might do the same and be able to love, forgive, celebrate, and give thanks for your mothers and yourselves. To the father’s out there, thank you for participating in the miracle of life and enabling mothering in that way. To those brave souls that found yourselves having babies before you felt ready and stepped up to do so with love, thank you. To all those that have mothered another’s child and/or accepted them as your own, thank you.
May we cherish the best memories and feel love. May we find ways to nurture others and ourselves… to have a healthy ‘mothering’ nature… one that loves unconditionally and gives graciously, including space and freedom to grow… this makes me think of Mother Earth/Nature and how we are all living within that sacred womb. May we explore the art of living and thrive here.
I am grateful beyond measure that my twin boys were finally able to take a breath on their own after living for 3 months in the hospital and even longer with oxygen support due to premature birth and that they are now thriving 11 year old boys with a passion for creating their own worlds (in ‘minecraft’ game) and interesting imaginations and big smelly feet and strong wills and healthy hands that made blueberry crepecakes this morning and curious questions and good night hugs and so much love that my heart burst open. Here is a favorite photo of my boys with my mom and me before she died.
Mother’s Day Blessings and Well Wishes to All. ♡
PS – The Inner Compass offering mentioned above is my gift to you today. It is available now AND with special coupon code “grateful4u” it will be FREE today (it will be 1/2 off with the same coupon code after today for the rest of the month of May). I am grateful for the vision and ability to offer this, for the mentors and cheerleaders that have encouraged and inspired this journey, for the companions choosing to be part of this circle. I’d love to ‘pay it forward’ to any that choose to receive this gift.
I also shared a Mother’s Day Memorial Day Tribute to my Mom (screenshot pictured below) in the recent Thrive True Spring e-zine (digital magazine), which is available now. Simply sign-up for the Thrivivalist Newsletter to receive this gift.
☆ So Fly She Did ☆
There has been a beautiful dragonfly zooming around our home this weekend and I am so grateful to have come across the dragonfly story shared in the e-zine, which now warms my heart every time I see one and think of my sweet angel momma. ♡